October 24, 2013

Rejoicing at St Anne’s – Year 2013

Exactly twelve months before, I came here with a heavy heart. At that time I had almost forgotten the meaning of joy and was moping around with days spent likened to a directionless soul. It was not like a dead-end unhappiness I was feeling, but more to like outright dead flat down emotions.

St Anne's old church in Bukit Mertajam, Penang
St Anne's new church - just next to the old church

Things weren’t going as the way I had wanted during that period. And when it further involved person(s), it makes healing a little more complicated, harder and takes a longer period of time.

Mary at the grotto
Inside the new church
Here where I had placed my wishes, hopes and aspirations to Him

That time, at the church of St Anne’s and at the grotto, I was praying fervently to Mother Mary and lastly to the good Lord. Prayers which was pretty much more like telling, asking, demanding Him to take away and erase the heaviness in me. My heart.

I had hoped for an instant healing.

How silly.

Lord Jesus' grandmother ; Holy Mother Mary's mother ~ our St Anne (left)

St Anne's grotto

Now twelve months after, it’s a testament of the phrase ‘time will heal’. And it did heal. Though it took many months.

This year - I stood before the same Perpetual Mary & our good Lord again. But this time however – I was feeling blissful. I was feeling contentment. I was feeling joy. And I had not forgotten to thank the Lord for the many times He had helped to carry my cross so that my burden wouldn’t be too heavy on me.

Flower offerings and prayers at Mary's grotto

I told Him I could feel His presence all the time during my hard days. I told Him I’m grateful. I told Him I will live life better from now. I bowed and I thanked Him again.

October 2, 2013

Take It Easy

Beautiful day, people-watching, sipping flat-white, in Dome cafe

Wondrous day.

I feel relief.

Things are going quite smooth. Though the on-going insomnia still attacks.

Sometimes I feel the hard mental and physical work has finally paid off.

But at times, I feel there's still so much more I haven't done and should do.

Today is a quiet day. Pretty much laid back.

Or is it because I'm making a conscious decision not to complain about just anything?


I am taking it easy, just for today.

I'll make it special. Just for myself. And perhaps for anybody that will be crossing my path.

And if I could make today as special and contented as I had plan to ....

Then, perhaps, I can extend it over to tomorrow too.